i do not like spaw days

hi everypawdy! i think it has been a long time since i writed here but i have been bizzy. i sleep so much you knoe. but i had this awful day and i wanted you all to knoe how mean my momma lady is cuz she made the day awful. she sed it was a spaw day. liar.

i can read minds. i readed momma lady’s mind. sometimes she goes into the bafroom and i follow her and wonder what she is doing. and sometimes she goes into the bafroom and i jus knoe she wants to give me a baf. i just knoe it! so that is what happened. i readed her mind and i started shaking and she started laffing. i hated her. i got flat on the floor and turned into a cement block and then she was not laffing. i showed her. but i still had a baf. damn her.

ennyway, she had more tricks. she took me to the v-e-t. i knoe what that is. i can spell. i am akshully a bery good speller. she put me in the car and i readed her mind agin. i was shaky and shaky and shaky at the v-e-t. but gess what? i losted 5 pounds since december! that is horrible! i am not eating enuff and i try to tell her that! she will not lissen to me.

the v-e-t is ok. but i was still scared. and then the most worse thing happened. the door opened to the room and 2 wimmen came in and they tried to use a noisy thing on my nales. they tried to grind them. and i almost broked my legs getting away. so then they went and got big cutting things and they held me down. and momma lady helped hold me down. and i grumbled and made a lot of noise. i was saying so many f-words. and they did not lissen. momma lady got close to me and sed i was good and she was proud of me and i just cussed and cussed. and she is still a liar.

a fat lot of good it did me. they cut off my nales.

i got back at my momma lady tho. she took me to the hardware store and i pooped on the floor.

that is all.

love, evelyn

2014-04-04 17.47.23

That hole you made

Dear Dakota,

She’s just not as good at it as you were, buddy. Look at the picture down there, dude. She’s simply not as good at it as you were.

In the first place, she doesn’t look up when we come inside. She’s so submissive, so she looks down and wiggles. You were submissive, too, but you lifted your head to look at us briefly. Little eye contact, of course, but we understood that about you.

And then there’s the tail issue. We could hear your mighty tail thumping all the way up the stairs, beating out a rhythm of welcome. She has no real tail, nothing to make noise with.

Don’t get me wrong–we love her as much as you did and we are taking very good care of her. She’s your baby, after all. But she’s not you. Nobody else is you. And now, 2 days short of 15 months after you hustled out of our lives, I still get tears in my eyes thinking about you, especially about your departure. Anyway, I love you, sweet potato.

If I’d known how much of my heart you would take when you left, would I have let you knit yourself into the fabric of my heart so tightly that your absence would unravel so much? I would. It’s mending, sweet boy.  And it was worth it. All of it and then some. We’d stop the car again. We’d make the long ride home again. We’d take the leg again. You were really never any trouble at all, DD.

Love,

Your Woman

2013-10-03 17.19.25