Author: Dakota Dawg

Dakota lived high in Colorado and was a member of the February Furballs. He lost a front leg to soft tissue sarcoma on 2-11-11. Dakota impulsively decided to see what the whole "rainbow bridge" business was about on 12-15-12 and before we could stop him, he was gone. But never forgotten. Never.

Barney Makes a Monkey out of Dakota

Here’s how it happened: I was watching “Die Hard” with the fam. It was at that great ‘yippie-ki-yay’ part we all love so much when I heard an astounding kerfuffle outside! It sounded like grinding and grating and rocks smashing and all kinds of awful stuff! We all looked at each other and my Woman said, “Someone has to go investigate.” Well, it was getting late and there was a bunch of snow and it was cold, so we did rock-paper-scissors to decide who’d go. I lost. (Paper’s pretty useless for almost anything.) I took the camera.

I knew what it was as soon as I saw it. Barney.  Sighing deeply and kicking myself in the butt for throwing down paper, I hauled the little bastard out and brought him inside. I dropped him into my Woman’s lap and went back to sleep. He was her problem now. She went outside and found the box he travels with. She dug around in there and found Angel Mackenzie’s Lakers scarf to wrap him in while he thawed out.

It didn’t take him long to defrost. He’s a cold-blooded little twerp, if you remember. I thought the decent thing to do was to say hello, get to know him, all that stuff. I thought maybe he was different from the way he’s been portrayed here. Right.

    

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Woman just happened to be there with the camera when I bared my teeth. This is what happened: Evelyn was chatting with Barney and he made a rude comment about my missing leg. I thought she made a little giggle. She swears she didn’t, but I dunno. Hence, the teeth-baring. What came next is…regrettable.

What came last was horrifying. My Woman said my behavior was, and I’ll quote, “more what is expected from a monkeybutt, so you can just be treated as if you are indeed a monkeybutt and wear Zephyr’s ears.” Thanks, Micki, for so thoughtfully including them in the Box From Hell.

 

I don’t know what will happen next. I am thinking, and planning. Tomorrow is a  new day, with new possibilities for…revenge.

Lazy, sleepy winter days

I have not had much to say lately. Winter has arrived and we are cold and snowy. I sleep a lot in front of the wood stove and explore around outside some. But there isn’t much excitement.

Evelyn and I did have a babysitter for two weeks but it was no big deal. She let us go sniff out the places that the rabbits hop around, just like my regular Woman does. She gave us some treats but not a whole lot because she was ordered  not to. She was an oddball and freaked out when it snowed. I thought she was nuts. It’s Colorado. It’s December. It’s 8300 feet in the air. WTH did she expect?

Anyway, no real news so I’ll just say “catch ya later, alligators!”

My Man is coming home!

Hello everyone. I heard some news. They think I don’t understand because I choose to be aloof sometimes. After all, my blog is thoughtful and erudite. I have a persona to maintain. Anyhoo, back in March my Man went away. I never really understood why, but my Woman and my Boy were not happy about it. Evelyn the Embarrassment and I were ok, but we liked our Man a lot. So when my Woman whispered into my ear that he is coming back, I didn’t even blink. But I’m happy.

Dakota’s Top 10 List about his Man:

10. He puts ice in the kitchen water bowl, just for fun.

9. He never laughed when I tried to lift my leg to pee…after my leg was stolen.

8. He makes my Boy leave me alone when I need my space.

7. He walked in the woods with me before the leg elves took my leg by stealth.

6. He installed the dog door.

5. He talks baby talk to me, but just the right amount. Not too much.

4. He makes Evelyn bug off.

3. He was so good to our Spirit dogs before they crossed the Rainbow Bridge.

2. He paid the vet bills.

1. He stopped the car for me when I was dumped!

I was practicing how I am going to meet him when he comes home. Whaddya think?

 

A roll in the hay

My Woman is trying to get me interested in things other than sleeping. This afternoon she took me outside and made me walk in the meadow with her. I didn’t want to walk. I had other plans.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mark Twain is my role model

I have decided I like this Mark Twain fellow a lot because he said “I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.” Lately it’s all I’ve been doing so I think I do like this man.

My Woman is getting a little concerned about all my sleeping. I can tell. How? She gripes about it to me all the time, that’s how! “Dakota, get out of the way!” “Dakota, all you do is sleep!” “Would you sleep somewhere else Dakota? I can’t open the front door!” It’s true. My favorite place to sleep is on the big entry mat and I like to put my nose into the door. That’s how I’ll know if burglars are coming. Of course, I won’t be able to wake up fast enough to do anything, but it’s the principal. If I yawn in a burglar’s face, maybe my breath will kill him. Ha! I amuse myself. And dog breath does have a purpose.

I don’t know why I’m so tired. We were having some really hot weather and that made us all sleepy. But the last three days have been much cooler. The heater even came on this morning! My Woman said that meant it was  62 in the house. That’s great dog weather! But still I sleep.

My Woman is threatening to take me to the V-E-T. She thinks I can’t spell. She also thinks I can’t run. Well, I think, too. And I think I’ll show her!

Love, Dakota